Dear Rorrie,
It has been 2 years since our LID and it appears we are only 1/2 way though our wait for you. We should have been home for almost a year by now. You should be in our arms instead of just getting our kisses in the wind each night. Due to the long increasing wait times I know it is unlikely that you have been born yet, but if you have been born you are just a newborn. We think you will be up to 2 years old at match date.
Today was really hard for me. I tried hard to enjoy my time with your siblings, but I kept seeing your face in their faces. Today was stressful with a broken card and my job cutting back on work. Your BaBa just kept his job a while back and I need to keep mine so we are stable for your adoption.
Rorrie, every day I think about you. Days move slowly or quickly but every day there is some time that is filled with you. Sometimes it is when I talk to friends & family about events in China (the upcoming Olympics or the recent devastating earthquake) or just the quiet times before bed or my only alone time in the shower.
Your big sister told me a few weeks ago that she would wait another 2 years for you. She really wants you here so she can hug you & kiss you... "help MaMa with the baby... even the diapers!" Your sister and brother began talking about you more lately. They want to know "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH HER" when you come home? Right now they are happy to put away their clothes, shoes and baby things for you to have when you come home. And they want to make sure I know where you should sleep when you come home, which will be the baby crib, and they both agree that is a good choice.
Half the time I think I can wait this long process out and that the day will come when you are in our arms and not just in our hearts. The other half the time I worry that this is over and you may never come home to our family, and that fear of you not joining our family is so painful. I made a vase with some river stones and curly willow to help with the waiting. I have placed two small river stones in the vase for each LID between now and our date. I believe there are 130 LID dates between us and so each month when we find out how long they have matched we take out two stones for each day. One stone for MaMa and one stone for BaBa. Hopefully watching the vase get more empty by the month will help.
Well Rorrie, it is now technically now 2 years and 1 day since our LID and very late so I will blow my kisses to you in the wind and go to sleep.
XOXO MaMa
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